May 20, 2008

A Penny Saved...

Well, here's another entry for the Grossest So Far--

Last Friday the three of us (His Highness, the Cat Daddy, and I) were playing in the living room. Mostly the Cat Daddy and I were watching His Highness run around, blabbering his ongoing monologue and occasionally showing us a toy he picked up. Well, one of the things he found was a penny, and what else do you do with a penny but immediately put it in your mouth and start taunting your parents?

The Cat Daddy commenced with his usual "Hey!" and said he thought I should go remove the penny right away, posthaste. I, knowing His Highness's propensity for playing chase, pretended like I wasn't coming after him at all, and wandered over to do a mouth sweep. As soon as I put my finger to his mouth, however, he clenched his teeth so I couldn't get in there. I whined and fussed until he finally opened up, and then found...nothing. The penny was gone. I looked first on the floor surrounding us, then at him, and he looked at me with a beastly little grin, and I said, "Well, he's just swallowed his first coin."

I have a theory about new dads. Daddies are thought of as the tough ones because they roughhouse and get all rowdy with the kiddos, but I think they worry more. Or maybe they just worry differently, I dunno. This is all to say that I was pretty sure swallowing a coin, especially a small one, was no big deal, but the Cat Daddy insisted I check with Dr. Sears just to make sure. Which is a perfectly reasonable thing to do, and I agreed that we both would feel better, so I did. Lo & behold, there was a special blurb dedicated solely to swallowed objects, which said that the penny should pass right on thru within 1-3 days, and we didn't need to call the doctor unless His Highness experienced excessive drooling, abdominal pain, or an inability to swallow.

What was the Cat Daddy's response? "Oh good, I feel better," or "That's a relief," perhaps? No. The first thing out of his mouth was "You are checking his poop for the penny. I'm not changing a poopy diaper until it's out."

Poop doesn't really freak me out. Don't get me wrong, it's gross. Especially since His Highness eats regular old grown-up food now, resulting in regular old grown-up poop. But as Ms. Debbie at daycare would say, "It's just poop." So it didn't sound like too big a deal to check for the penny. I thought about the most effective and least invasive methods for the task. My best idea was to use a fork and tap thru the poop feeling for a metal-on-metal touch, but I kept forgetting to grab a fork for diaper changes and ended up using the low tech method of poking my finger (covered with a wipe) randomly in the poop, followed by an even more thorough than normal hand washing. I must admit that it grossed me out some. The things mommies do for their kids...

In the end, it took the full three days and then some, but this morning the penny finally appeared. I didn't even have to dig--an edge of it was visible enough that I knew exactly what it was. I sang, "Yay, the penny is out!" His Highness didn't bat an eye.

Now I'm a pretty frugal person. I like to save, and I love a bargain. And I have some crunchy tendencies in the way of being a good steward of natural resources and all. But not this time. I left the penny right where it was, and it will sit in the landfill along with the disposable diaper for eons to come. I just couldn't do it...

5 comments:

Bee Repartee said...

Oh, no you Di-int!! HAHAHAHA!!!

Bludab said...

Gross - reminds me of when Pinkalicious swallowed approximately half the beach when she was one - and the sand returned to our apartment by way of a diaper, virtualy unchanged. I kinda shrugged and thought, eh, minerals! Pastor T freaked out and had the doc on the phone ( who thought she was actually choking on sand/and or literally buried in it). Once reassured, he's still crazy vigilant on any trip to the shore! And The Chubb swallowing a coin is for some reason my biggest phobia of the moment. You handled it well!

Smiller said...

Been there, done that. Except the big one was old enough to cry over not having her penny and wanted it back. Sorry, I'm not going in for it!

linda t said...

Waaay too funny... I mean, thank God the penny made it's way out... but funny all the same.

DramaMama said...

AW! You should have saved it in a neat little box and placed it on display.

Our local radio station just did a "nut cracker" that was a crank call to a bronzing company. Most people have their baby shoes bronzed but the DJ called to ask if he could get his baby's first poop bronzed instead. They said "YES"! Wow! You should have had it bronzed. ha ha ha