Dec 31, 2014

Act: A Year In Review...

My feelings about New Years have been decidedly mixed, but this time I find myself feeling reflective and appreciative.  I chose the word "Act" for 2014, and as I look back over the year, I have indeed acted.

Some of my acts have been fairly minimal and extremely practical, such as keeping a daily to-do list, getting my workout & back exercises done first thing so I have the rest of the day for other tasks, that sort of thing. 

Others have been a team effort, such as being super-proactive about our moving tasks so that we could settle in as quickly as possible for our year-long extravaganza here in Alabama. We are experts at setting up utilities, finding the best local eateries, and wondering aloud how it is that Baby Jesus's arm could break amid all that bubble wrap and packing paper. 

Some have been social, such as staying in a conversation instead of trying to end the agony that is small talk. Engaging and listening more, instead of staying only in my own brain. Taking the risk to be less "generically nice" and more "specifically me" as I get to know people.

And some have been at once so simple and incredibly difficult. Making the calls...again...for help with my weaker areas...again. Like therapy and back care and stuff. Signing on, knowing that each would require a certain commitment of time and effort. Coming to the realization that, at least for now, ongoing help for both is necessary. 

Lastly, my favorite act of 2014 ties into my goals for 2015. I found that while I've been getting help for my back (and probably will for-maybe-ever), I'm also to a point of decent enough strength to pull the trigger on my first half-marathon.  I signed up for the Montgomery Half, scheduled for March, and downloaded a training plan, and started racking up more miles than usual. If all goes well, it will be a nice segue into reaching my marathon-before-age-40 goal. 

I think it's important to note that in keeping this Act resolution, I haven't been any busier than normal. In some cases I've even taken more deliberate rest than I would normally allow myself. I think what it did was to help me be more intentional about which actions were most important to me, so that I did those, instead of my normal anesthetizing patterns of busy-ness. Sometimes, anyway. I mean, I'm still busy...but I feel a little more peaceful about it these days. 

I also think it's important to note the "little" in "a little more peaceful." I haven't overhauled my entire life, or somehow made my kids stop messing up the house (heaven help us all), or anything like that. In fact, I'm probably the only one who notices any sort of difference in myself over the previous year, but even though it's little, I'm really proud of that little step. We can all be proud of our little steps, I think. 

Except with regard to therapy and back care--the results of both of those have been feeling a LOT better. So it's, like, a greater-sum-game, or whatever you call it when you take a little step and end up running down the road with a big grin on your face like you just don't care. Seriously. Go get your help, people.

I'm still mulling over what I might choose for 2015. I could just say "Half-Marathon," but that feels like cheating, both because it's a hyphenated word and because I actually made the goal a while back and the timing just worked itself out this way. Possible contenders are "healing," "kindness," and "don't-assume-intent," but the jury is still out.

Therefore, I wish you a year full of life and love, mostly because that's my own desire, and whether or not you choose a word, or resolutions, or anything at all to accomplish in 2015, it is a good and worthy desire. 

Happy New Year!